Confessions of a Room Mother

It started innocently enough. I was a stay at home mom. I had the time. I had the desire. I had the hand painted t-shirt dress with matching hair bow and coordinating tennis shoes. I couldn’t sign my name to the classroom volunteer list fast enough. Soon I was helping with Matt’s kindergarten parties, and going on field trips. Three-year-old Scott was the perfect tag-along.

Someone in PTA noticed, and before I knew what had happened, I was taking yearbook orders and spraying disinfectant in old roller skates on fund raiser night at the rink. By the time the boys were in first and third grades, Drew and I were PTA presidents. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, unless you did it for the reasons I did.

I had considered doing the PTA officer thing later on, say when the boys were in 3rd and 5th grades. But someone from the nominating committee pulled me aside and said, “If you do it now, the principal will see that your kids get the best teachers all the way through sixth grade.” That got my attention. What mother didn’t want her kids to have the best teachers? Written requests for specific teachers were frowned upon. It was the only way.

Have you ever signed up to be in charge of something ‘for your children’, only to look up and realize that your own kids are miserable, your house is a wreck, and your husband doesn’t seem to enjoy doing the laundry as much as he used to? That pretty much sums up August ‘89 through February 1990. In March, we were transferred to Dallas. So much for my plan to have the best teachers lined up for the next 5 years.

God taught me several things through that experience. I learned that it’s the moms, not the kids who care if the napkins match the cups that match the plates that match the snack. (Can I have an AMEN, sister Shipley?) And even though Matt got the most requested teacher that year, it wasn’t the best situation for him. I learned to ask God to place the boys where He wanted them to be. Imagine that!

I don’t want to discourage you from volunteering at school. We had several opportunities to be a part of the activities our kids have enjoyed. It was a great way to meet their friends’ parents. It helped us appreciate the time and effort teachers, coaches and band directors put into our kids. A lot of money was raised for some very good causes.

But it wasn’t until the boys were in middle school and high school that I learned the most effective way for me to volunteer. Sara Snyder introduced me to Moms in Touch prayer ministry. I can’t begin to tell you the peace that brought to me as they began to choose their own class schedules, school activities, friends and dates. There were tryouts and projects and big tests and broken hearts, and even a few bomb threats, as I remember. We know the positive results. But who knows how many evils avoided our kids because we were praying?

Note to young moms: Before you sign up for anything, please prayerfully consider giving one hour a week to pray with another mom for your child. I could have saved myself so much anxiety and burnout if I had known about MITI sooner. Ask me about it. Ask Sara. Better yet, ask Matt, Scott, Evan, Erin or Ian. The fact that they knew every week, other moms were coming together to pray for them was powerful.

Once you have made that a priority, I promise, the Spirit will give you direction as you choose more visible ways to connect with your child and their school. You will be blessed, not burdened by the time you give. If you’re not able to volunteer for the carnival, someone else will do it. But if you’re not praying for your child, who is?