Shower to Shower

Can we talk?

About showers.

Baby showers, 2nd baby showers, 3rd baby showers, baby showers before the wedding showers, wedding showers, 2nd wedding showers, baby showers for members’ children who do not attend RE, showers for members’ grandchildren who do not attend RE, showers (aka: ‘Senior Teas’) for girls who graduate high school...what am I leaving out?

I love a party. If you can think of a reason to honor someone you can borrow my forks or have it at my house. I’m not suggesting that we have shower police, but there are some inconsistencies and I just need to think out loud for a minute.

The Young Families class has a pretty good system. They have brunches during class for 2nd, 3rd, etc. babies. Even if you are having your 4th baby boy, diapers and hugs are always appreciated. Can I have an AMEN, Susan Thomas?

Maybe I’m still longing for the good ol’ days of the Lubbock Broadway church of Christ wedding showers. I don’t know who wrote the rules, but here’s how it went down. You registered at Dillard’s and Hemphill-Well’s. Target hadn’t hit town yet. There were no pricing guns, although Drew would have loved that. Just a fussy west Texas gal who had been in that department for 30 years and frowned if you even thought about registering for anything besides dishes, glassware, silver, linens and small kitchen appliances.


But here’s my favorite part. You had them look up the name of the bride, bought the gift, and they took care of delivering it to the hostess’ house, unwrapped! So on SATURDAY, when all showers should be held, all you had to do was get to Gladys Ellis’ house. She would be standing at the door with the bride and the mothers of the couple, while her friends took their assigned places at the food table, kitchen sink, and gift room.

The gifts were all on display, so you greeted the honoree, grabbed a plate and cup of something, and went to the gift room to oooh and ahhh over all the treasures. You could come and go anytime between 2:00 and 4:00, and get on with the rest of your day. The advantages are 1) you actually got to say hello to the bride 2) there was a better chance of getting a parking place in front of and inside the house, because we weren’t all there at once 3) you didn’t have to pay for gift wrap.

I know that isn’t practical in the metroplex. We live all over the place and delivery isn’t complimentary anymore. But my friends were sweet to let me break tradition when our boys got married. I just didn’t want Kyla and Terran sitting and opening packages for two hours and not getting to meet any of you. A few people were suspicious about why I wanted gifts to be brought unwrapped, until I explained. We loved it. Okay...enough about that.

Here’s my other concern. The hostess thing. I have had several young women/new members ask me how to get on a hostess list. So here’s how I explain it. We have unofficial shower teams. Each team wants to have a lovely party for the honoree. Each team wants to go in on a nice hostess gift. Some teams prefer to have several hostesses so the expenses can be shared. Some prefer to have several hostesses so more can be spent on the hostess gift. The problem for the rookie is knowing ahead of time which team she has joined. For some budgets, it can come as quite a shock to receive a sticky note at the end of the party saying she owes $50 or more. For others, it is just as painful to find out that their cost is much less than they would have normally contributed for a gift to their friend.

I’m going to go out on a limb here and say this; if you want to help with a shower and have a limit, let the house hostess know, and it will be worked out. Sometimes we have each brought food and a gift, and shared the lesser expenses. If the cost needs to be reduced, then those who feel a need to spend more can give an additional gift to the honoree. It’s pretty much determined by the hostess who is cleaning her potties for the party. And if you want to be a hostess and can't be there for the event, you can pay your part and be a ghostess! 

That’s just my opinion. What do you think?